By Ishola Kayode
Ace actress Stella Damasus and her best friend and soul mate producer Daniel Ademinokan had wanted to take their relationship slow, to cruise along a little longer but the church intervened.
The pastors felt that since the two famous members of the choir enjoyed each other’s company so much they should get married before they do something that would set a bad example to the other members of the choir. “The marriage was unnecessary,” said Ms Damasus who believed that the rush to get them wedded was responsible for the collapse of her third marriage in such a disastrous manner.
In a recent interview with Teju Babyface she said the foundation of the union was built not so much on love as on the fear of public censure. It was, in other words, a marriage of convenience.
In a rare attempt at explaining her side of the matter she said, “Religion made us (she and Daniel) marry when we were not supposed to.
“He was my friend. He was awesome, but as a couple, things did not work out. We messed things up. When we went our separate ways, out of love and respect for each other, we did not talk about it. We just left it as it was. People blamed me for this last one (marriage crash) but they didn’t know what happened.
“We were attending a church together. I was a chorister, while he was the choir director. The leaders of the church felt that what we were doing was wrong because we were church workers and we needed to set examples. They felt we would be tempted to do things.
“At that point, I was doing more church work and did not focus on my spiritual life. I followed the church blindly because I did not want to offend them. He (Daniel) was not even ready, and we did not know each other well. When we got married, we realized that we were not compatible.”
For Stella Damasus, the end of her third marriage came in the most brutal form; she had to found out on the video sharing platform YouTube. Mr. Ademinokan had apparently since moved on and even married another woman without wasting time.
News of the breakup came as a surprise to many who had looked at the couple as a model of love and conviviality. While the going was good both Stella and her hubby projected the image of a couple living in bliss. The social media was replete with pictures and videos of them publicly professing their love for each other, looking all lovey-dovey. Sometimes the displays get quite mushy with Stella telling the world how Mr Ademinokan was her “best friend and soul mate.”
Indeed barely three years ago when Daniel Ademinokan celebrated his birthday, Stella had showered praises on him, covering him with sundry terms of endearment. She took to her Instagram to announce her love for him. “It is my husband’s birthday, and I am grateful to God for such a special gift. Daniel, you are an amazing and exceptional husband and father. You have been a blessing in my life; a teacher, friend, and pastor. I love you so much, boo. Thank you for making me feel special every single day. Thank you for being so selfless and caring…”
Some people however said the seed of the marriage’s collapse was present at the beginning. They blamed Stella for snatching the man from his wife, a fellow thespian, Doris Simeon whose marriage to Mr. Ademinokan allegedly collapsed when Stella came on the scene.
Many also felt that she should have prevailed on Ademinokan not to take the son he had with Doris to the United States of America with Stella. They felt the former wife was treated unfairly in many respects.
However, in an interview with a media personality, Emma Emerson, in December 2014, Stella addressed those issues. She said, “I am not a kid. I am 36 years old. I am not about to start hiding myself. I was waiting for somebody to actually ask me this question, because all I had heard for the past three years were rumours. If I steal something from somebody, and the person is really the owner of the thing, the person should come and ask me, ‘you took something from me, give me back’. But nobody did that.
Did anybody ever ask, what went wrong? Why would a man pick up his son and walk away from his marriage?”
In the end the same fate seemed to have befallen Stella as Mr. Ademinokan has again walked away from his marriage to Stella, her second marriage after the sudden death of her first husband whom many believe remained the true love of her life.
But Stella is no stranger to misfortune and she had managed to handle her breakup with Daniel with some aplomb. She has been posting beautiful pictures of herself, and her two daughters on social media.
She had also find support in the solidarity of some celebrities, such as Kate Henshaw, Mofe Duncan, and Bouqui, who regularly endorse her posts and shower her with words of encouragement.
